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Disney Movie News & Reviews

REVIEW: Last Christmas – The Gift We All Need This Season

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Last Christmas posterMy daughter Sophia and I have somewhat of an addiction to bad Hallmark movies. Luckily for us, there’s not one but two whole channels devoted to playing them year round. There are Halloween and fall-themes, generic romantic ones, and of course, Christmas love stories. Now, having said that, I will admit, probably about 97% of our viewing is so we can poke fun at it. I mean, they’re fun to set a mood, but the tropes are always the same. Straight woman can’t find love with straight man of same race, because she’s either a “career woman” that never had time for love, or has to to back to her home town to help take over a family business that’s failing, or about to be bought out by a big, mean, business man (who also happens to be single and her same race). Every now and then the main characters will already be in a relationship, but it’s all wrong, and the right person is just waiting for them back home…

So while I’m sure there are folks that take these movies very seriously, we are not those people. However that does not mean we aren’t hopeless romantics! One of my favorite movies is Love Actually, and I was thrilled when Sophia finally watched it a few years back and also fell in love. We also share a love for Moulin Rouge, so we aren’t scrooges I promise. Having been exposed to both really good and really bad romantic movies, we had high hopes for Last Christmas given the cast and story behind its creation. We were not disappointed.

The premise behind Last Christmas is taking George Michael’s famous Wham! song of the same name, and creating an entire movie around it. Sounds like a short movie, right? But really, that was just the impetus. The idea for this movie came about 10 years ago, and George Michael was approached and actually liked the idea, insisting on Emma Thompson’s involvement. They met several times and went over story ideas before his untimely death on Christmas day in 2016. It took a long time to get the story right, with Emma Thompson and Greg Wise writing treatments together. The development grew and evolved from there to what is sure to become an instant classic. Last Christmas has all the side character development and charm of Love Actually, where you actually care about the people on the screen and are glad you get to know a little more about them. It has all the important messaging of It’s a Wonderful Life (the inspiration for the director’s desire to make a classic Christmas movie) without being heavy handed or feeling like the audience is manipulated.

Last Christmas movie

Kate used to feel special, but got sick and now that she’s better, her life is a shambles. She works in a Christmas shop and auditions as a singer/actress on the side. Suddenly Tom appears and things start to “look up.” He helps her realize that life is about more than just trying to make yourself happy, it’s about helping others be happy too. I won’t reveal more than that, but the story does have a twist, which Sophia and I both guessed, but it didn’t make it any less powerful.

The rest of the film is full of beautiful London scenes and quirky characters, along with some real world issues to confront as well. George Michael’s compelling music is woven throughout, acting like another character in the story, a literal chorus with a message to share. It’s truly a multi-level gift, the movie itself, the wonderful acting and story, and the music; reborn for a new audience to enjoy and appreciate. (And older audiences, as I instantly wanted to download the soundtrack on my way home, but settled for my George Michael playlist).

Last Christmas also normalized a lot of hot button issues (that frankly shouldn’t be hot button issues in 2019), like mixed race couples, same-sex couples, immigration, homelessness, and our preconceptions. It was great to see a movie come out and not attempt to capitalize or divide based on those issues, but rather just be a mirror to real life and the many people that live in it.

I cannot wait to see this movie again, and to be able to watch it every year as I do with Love Actually. Until then, I will remain inspired by the many messages of love, self-reflection, selflessness, helping others, and I’ll remember to Look Up.  

 

Last Christmas movie

 

Last Christmas opens everywhere Friday, November 8th – Go see it!

You can get the soundtrack on Friday too:

 

*As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases

Disclaimer: I was invited to a screening of Last Christmas at no cost, but as always, my thoughts and opinions are my own.

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REVIEW: Maleficent: Mistress of Lazy Filmmaking

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As soon as I sat down to watch this movie I regretted not re-watching the original 2014 film Maleficent to refresh my memory of the plot (as it stands, I actually remembered absolutely none of it). But as I got to thinking, I realized it was actually okay that I hadn’t done this. I assume that most people don’t really remember the plot of Maleficent, and that they too would be going in relatively blind.

If you’ve read any other film review I’ve written for this site, you’ll know they all largely follow the same basic theme: I don’t really care for the movie and think it has a lot of poorly executed elements, but in the end, it’s at least mildly entertaining. So it should be no surprise that I think Maleficent: Mistress of Evil really fits that mold too.

In passing I’ve definitely said previously that the original Maleficent was my favorite live-action remake. I feel like I need to clarify this. I don’t like the original Maleficent very much either, but I liked what it attempted to be – something that wasn’t just a 1:1 remake of an animated movie from several decades ago. It had its own perspective and take on the original story that could’ve made for something very compelling. Ultimately though, personally, I don’t think that idea was seen through very well at all.

My issue at this point is that all of these movies are extremely safe and marketable. The ‘live-action’ remakes yes, but even Disney’s seldom seen original IP are stale and worry-free. An avid viewer of such movies would be quick to point out something like The Nutcracker and The Four Realms; a unique take on a classic with a bold choice in design and fresh new elements. But this too sees the shortcomings of Disney’s safe/marketable rules. A new idea like Nutcracker is heavily constrained in its budget, and ultimately can’t do very much other than simply play it safe. Now, do I think that if Nutcracker hadn’t been so constrained it would’ve been good? No, but that’s beside the point.

Obviously it’s within Disney’s best interests to play to their biggest markets and try to make as much money as possible. They can’t necessarily do that if they were to make one-off films with a unique plot that breaks the mold – it’s way too risky. They’re in the business of making money, and every movie that has left Disney’s production team for at least the past five years has been well crafted to be perfectly safe.

 

Maleficent: Mistress of Confusing Art Design

Elle Fanning is Aurora in Disney’s live-action MALEFICENT: MISTRESS OF EVIL

I assume you can begin to gauge my opinion of Mistress of Evil from that alone. It took no risks, had no groundbreaking plot, made no profound statement.

I don’t think it’s necessarily fair to just criticize every aspect of the movie though – there were some things that I really did enjoy. I thought a lot of the art design was VERY good. Locations like the homeland of the Fae (from which Maleficent herself originates), felt straight out of Pandora: The World of Avatar – and ironically made me really look forward to Avatar 2. 

But it would seem that no good deed goes unpunished, because I absolutely could NOT stand the design of the fairies/creatures of the Moors. Looking at them made me want to turn the movie off. I seriously wish that a photo of them had been publicly released or sent to us. For those who do see the movie, I’m talking about the strange hedgehog girl and the bizarre mushroom boy. For those who don’t see the movie, I’m sorry that I sound crazy right now. Those two examples are just so odd looking that I hated them, but people who’ve seen the first Maleficent may remember the incredibly uncanny valley Fairy Godmother characters. Be advised that the first 10 minutes of this movie are dedicated to full CGI establishing shots that are teeming with more and more of these weird and uncomfortable creatures that I did not very much care for.

Character-design-rant aside, I also happened to enjoy the soundtrack. It fell into the background a bit more than I would’ve liked, but there were some moments when I thought it was used in a very compelling way. In a similar vein, the sound design itself was actually pretty notable. There’s a lot of odd creatures in this movie but they all manage to sound exactly like how you’d expect them to.

I had never heard of the director before, and looking at his work again now, the only notable thing he’s made was 2017’s Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales. Again, I enjoyed that movie – a bit more than Mistress of Evil – but it really just stayed the course of safe-bet movies.

 

Maleficent: Mistress of Unnecessary

Angelina Jolie is Maleficent in Disney’s MALEFICENT: MISTRESS OF EVIL.

So what do we take away from this? If you’re Disney, apparently nothing. I saw yesterday that on October 18th (opening day of the movie), my local theater is showing Mistress of Evil 28 separate times. It will definitely make money, unfortunately. Disney has placed all of their filming-eggs into one very safe and secure metaphorical basket.

Sure, Mistress of Evil was yet again moderately entertaining. But to me personally, so much of the movie felt poorly executed or lazily done that I came away from it not liking it at all. Even down to the structure of the plot, it felt like a direct-to-DVD sequel from the late 90s. The only difference is that this one had a massive budget and was shown to me in an IMAX theater.

I think lazy is the best way to describe Mistress of Evil. When asking around to my friends, over half of them didn’t even know that the movie was being made, let alone coming out in two days. Before the film started we were greeted with a few short promos of upcoming Disney productions to look forward to. Of these, Z-O-M-B-I-E-S 2, a Disney Channel Original sequel to a movie I’ve never seen, made for an age group I’m way too old for, piqued my interest far more than any part of Mistress of Evil did. 

I’ll end it off by saying this: I don’t think Maleficent: Mistress of Evil is worth seeing. Normally I would add, “but that’s just me”, but this time, I really don’t think it’s just me. The Disney formula is growing old, and sure, it’s a profitable one, but for how long? Mistress of Evil probably would’ve worked better as a Disney Channel Original Movie (and from the production of it, it would’ve fit right in stylistically) or even a Disney+ Original. Especially given that it’s an unnecessary sequel to an unmemorable movie from five years ago.

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REVIEW: There’s a New King in Town

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… Or is there?

Before I begin, I think it’s important I say that, like all of the most recent films produced by Disney, I wanted this to do well. I want nothing less than the next great film from the most successful media company there has ever been. That being said, these are my opinions.

To start this review, I actually want to digress into a quick anecdote. One of my favorite new modern bands is a group called Greta Van Fleet. They’re a rock band that sounds pretty similar to Led Zeppelin. However, to quite a lot of people – including one notably scathing review on Pitchfork – they’re just a cheap Zeppelin knock-off, mooching off the successful sound of Robert Plant and the like. I personally like the band, and didn’t really understand why these people had such a strong hatred for them. That is, until I saw 2019’s The Lion King.

There’s no need to worry about spoilers in this review, as this is, beat-for-beat, exactly the same movie that was released 25 years ago. Visually, it obviously does look very different (and we’ll get to that in a second), but at least 95% of the scenes in this are unchanged from the original, even going down to random establishing shots that could have been completely unique.

Can you feel the love tonight…?

THE LION KING – (Top to Bottom) Timon and Billy Eichner, Pumbaa and Seth Rogen and Zazu and John Oliver. Photo by Kwaku Alston. © 2019 Disney Enterprises, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Before we get much farther, it’ll be important to note that this review is much harsher than those I usually write. This movie made me mad that it exists. This is equally as much a review of The Lion King as it is a review of Disney’s presence in the modern box office. I can justify that because very little changed between this and the original, leaving very little to review – though I’ll go over what I can.

The vocal performances (acting-wise) feel very lazy. This is embarrassing, because this has got to be one of the most expensive casts for any movie outside of the MCU lately. Something about this movie makes the completely star-studded cast feel like a B-Team. This is not without exceptions though. Billy Eichner and Seth Rogen steal the show every time they’re on screen. But notable greats like James Earl Jones and Chiwitel Ejiofor feel like they delivered one pass on their lines and left the studio. Everyone else falls very flat.

Song-wise, I really can’t complain. The songs are good regardless of who’s singing them, and since the two leads double as Grammy-winning vocalists, it’s no surprise that they’re good. The songs are actually where I would have wished they’d stayed true to the original. The original soundtrack is fantastic, and the Broadway score only brings more life and material to it. I did enjoy the new Beyoncé track, I just thought it was oddly placed. And the lyric changes to Be Prepared weren’t really terrible, it was just weird that they chose to change that, but leave in the exact same shot of Simba walking past a spiderweb in the Elephant Graveyard.

… because I could not.

THE LION KING – Featuring the voices of JD McCrary as Young Simba, Billy Eichner as Timon and Seth Rogen as Pumbaa, Disney’s “The Lion King” is directed by Jon Favreau. In theaters July 19, 2019. © 2019 Disney Enterprises, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

The animation is something that will come up often in discussions about this film. I recently watched Jon Favreau’s The Jungle Book for the first time, and it felt weird to me because of the juxtaposition between a human actor and uncanny valley animated creatures. The Lion King feels as weird somehow, without the use of a human actor.

I want to pause and say that while I have studied and practiced a bit of animation, I am by NO MEANS a professional. I didn’t care much for this movie, but I do give all the credit in the world to the incredible animation team. A lot of this movie does look absolutely amazing. I kept thinking that this would be a great demo reel for Samsung displays or something in the future. That being said, animators, please don’t kill me for the next section.

A lot of the problems I had with the vocal performances were that they were delivered as if it were a typical animated film. If you closed your eyes while watching this movie, I don’t think it would really feel out of place. The problem becomes introduced when the characters are hyper-realistic animals, which in the end, cannot convey complex emotion very well. The original Lion King works as an emotional experience (as do all hand-drawn films) because of how expressive the characters can be, even if they’re animals, or sometimes inanimate objects. When you take all of that facial expressiveness and cartoon performance out, it can be very difficult to connect.

Undoubtedly, people will feel emotions while watching this. Baby Simba is cute. Mufasa dying is sad. But that’s just the nature of animals themselves. I could have walked into the theater and been shown just a still-image of a baby lion, and still would have said, “Aw, cute”.

Long Live the King.

A FUTURE KING IS BORN – In Disney’s all-new “The Lion King,” Simba idolizes his father, King Mufasa, and takes to heart his own royal destiny. Featuring JD McCrary and Donald Glover as young Simba and Simba, “The Lion King” roars into U.S. theaters on July 19, 2019. ©2019 Disney Enterprises, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

I really don’t understand why this was made the way it was, or who it’s for. Most of the audience watching this movie will remember the entire plot of the original, whether they grew up watching it, or just because it’s a big enough piece of pop culture to be ingrained in the minds of anyone who knows its name. So why, then, is it just exactly the same as the original? 

My lasting impression was that it was just to make money off of people’s nostalgia, in the laziest (from an executive standpoint) way possible. The acting felt lazy and half-done. The screenplay was just copy/pasted by a temp. The score was legitimately just the original score with one or two new songs, which were moved to the credits. 

There have been “live action” remakes in the past, and no, none have really been very good. But this one just feels like the most cruel of all. But they make them because they do make money. There definitely is an audience for these movies (whom I have not met). All I’ll say is that you vote with your wallet. Seven years ago, before it was even announced, I never thought I would be advising people against seeing a remake of one of my favorite Disney movies, but here we are.

Ultimately, this movie felt, to me, like a film-student’s final project. The animation is nice to look at, but it serves more as a weird gimmick than an entertaining movie. I could imagine myself scrolling through reddit and finding a post where someone re-animated The Lion King in Cinema 4D, and then it’s just the entirety of The Lion King (2019).

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REVIEW: ‘Aladdin’ Could’ve Used a Magical Lamp

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To begin, I’ll say that this movie entertained me. To be fair, most Disney movies do – they’re lighthearted, often fairly funny, and usually have a bit of a spectacle to them/their experience. 2019’s Aladdin definitely checks all three of those boxes, but it does little outside of that.

Aladdin was fun to watch. From a design point of view, it was very interesting. I’m already very invested in Middle Eastern art and culture, and this film certainly managed to live in that world, arguably far more than the original did. And visually, it’s the equivalent to seeing a well developed Broadway show, like the ones Disney puts on (Aladdin, for example). That is to say, every musical number was a big show stopper that is definitely worth watching.

But outside of that, this film really lacks anything worthwhile.

Even after seeing it, I still wholeheartedly believe that this movie really did not need to be made. I don’t know that anyone was really clamoring for a live-action remake of a movie that’s only 27 years old, and didn’t really have many problems. Fans of the original are better off still watching the original, which is largely more charming than this version. And if you’re specifically seeking a bigger spectacle of Aladdin, the Broadway version still already exists, and while it’s not my favorite musical in the world, I think there is definitely good fun to be had, making this movie ultimately unnecessary.

This movie is admittedly more entertaining than the original, which to me never really stood out from that era’s other animated works. Like I said, the musical numbers are all as big and epic as you could ever want them to be – with all of the CGI in the world assisting Prince Ali make his big entrance. But those don’t necessarily add up to something worth more than the sum of its parts.

Will Smith is Genie in Disney’s live-action ALADDIN., directed by Guy Ritchie.

The musical numbers are actually, to me, the best parts of the film. They take Alan Menken’s wonderful original soundtrack and bring a vibrant new life to it, which fits perfectly in the vivid world the characters now live in. This is of course not including the two new songs written just for this film, both of which are sung by Jasmine. They were stylistically very clashing with the rest of the soundtrack, and felt almost as if Disney was just trying to make a song as “empowering” as ‘This is Me’, from The Greatest Showman, just because of how popular that song has become. Additionally, most of the ‘Prince Ali’ scene has actually already been posted to YouTube, and I think watching that clip is really all you need from this movie. It gives you a taste of exactly what to expect.

Will Smith’s performance is what actually keeps this movie from sinking under though. The musical numbers are great, but they are few and far between. Every time Smith was on screen he stole the show, which is actually important because most of the other performances felt nearly lifeless. Before the release of this, there was a lot of controversy about his appearance in the movie, and how they would pull it off. I didn’t really care one way or the other, but I definitely had no issue with him in the end.

Aladdin (Mena Massoud) meets the larger-than-life blue Genie (Will Smith) in Disney’s live-action adaptation ALADDIN, directed by Guy Ritchie.

Overall, it was indeed entertaining, but lacked any real purpose. The plot was more or less the same as the original, so it’s not as if they’re making any groundbreaking leaps or bounds in storytelling, which is bold for a remake of a movie only 27 years old. You can watch this movie and have fun, but you can watch the original and get the same emotional beats/moments. And simply listening to the soundtrack is enough to be satisfied for a “new” Aladdin.

There is something beautifully ironic about this movie being entirely surface-level though, as it mirrors Prince Ali’s character arc in the original film.

Parts of it felt like a Hallmark movie, parts of it felt like a Disney Channel Original Movie. It was just an odd thing that exists, but I’m not sure why. It was fun in the same way a direct-to-video sequel is fun. It exists purely to be looked at, and will be enjoyed largely because people like the original, and this movie didn’t change anything.

While it’s not a spoiler in any way, this movie ends with a black screen, you hear the words, “DJ Khaled… Anotha one!!” and the credits roll, and that should really speak for itself.

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Another Spoiler Free EndGame Review

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I never used to be a Marvel fan. Just like I never used to be a Harry Potter fan, or a Lord of the Rings fan, or a Star Wars fan. Then, as with all fandoms, a story spoke to me. With Star Wars, it was those darn adorable ewoks back in 1983. I was 8, and during a time when my sticker collection and unicorns filled most of my time, Star Wars lured me in with fuzzy teddy bear-like creatures. What was their story? What was going to happen to them? And I became a fan. (As a side-note, that fandom has faded for me since I feel like it’s been overdone and shoved down our throats for a few years now, the original trilogy will always be where my heart lies.)

With Lord of the Rings, I took longer to discover this amazing series. I had read The Hobbit in 4th grade and haaaaated it. It seemed so boring to me and I did not enjoy the story at all. Fast forward to many years later, when the buzz was everywhere about The Lord of the Rings. I had grown up loving fantasy and fairytale stories, so I figured I better read the Lord of the Rings trilogy before the movies came out. I dug in and was lost in those books for an entire summer, following up with The Silmarillion and a Tolkien biography. I became a super fan. (Like, obsessed for a while. Tolkien was a genius and I am still in awe of the worlds and entire languages he created!)

With Harry Potter, I tried to avoid them as long as I could. I felt like J.K. Rowling was totally ripping off Lord of the Rings lore, and I refused to read or see any of the movies. One night, Chamber of Secrets was on ABC Family. I got sucked in. I actually liked it. (Oddly it’s now my least favorite of the movie series.) So I read all the books (that were out at that time) and even attending midnight release parties of the last few books. Yet another super fan was born. [And yes, I promise we’ll get to EndGame – but if you are going to see it, get used to long backstories leading up to the action. 😉 ]

But with Marvel, it was different. I never read Marvel comics growing up. I read Donald Duck and Casper and Archie comics to pass the time during summers in Ogunquit, Maine. I was never really into superheroes and aside from Superman movies in the 80’s didn’t care too much about any of them.

Then, Iron Man happened. I have always loved Robert Downey, Jr. and instantly fell in love with his egotistic-but-brilliant-bad-boy-billionaire-with-a-change-of-heart character. The stories, the visuals, the blurring of lines between good and evil, I loved it all. What I found so interesting is that while the Marvel Comics already existed for decades, how a story ended or crossed over with another character, did not mean it would end up that way on screen. So there were still surprises in many cases for everyone, even the comic fanboys and girls.

I guess then I became a Marvel fan, because each movie drew me in and I wanted more. (I still have never seen 2008’s The Incredible Hulk but eventually I’m sure I will just for completist reasons along with Captain Marvel which I missed the screening for and just haven’t had time to see but I will, I swear!) I loved that they were funny while still having tons of dramatic action and also showing life lessons that each of the characters learn along the way. That’s part of what makes the series so great; there is a hero for everyone. I love something about every single Avenger. The dynamics that have grown and shifted between all of them are a great legacy for fans.

So as a fan, of course, the prospect of an “end game” of any sort was a tad depressing. Just as I did not relish the ending of the LotR trilogy in Return of the King, or the final book or movie in the Harry Potter series, I was not looking forward to the ending of such an epic, 10+ year set of stories. That said, it was an action-packed, shocking, cathartic, dramatic, draining, and satisfying (in most cases) ending to this phase of the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

What follows is the rest of my spoiler-free review of Avengers: Endgame – (You can read Christian’s spoiler-free review here)

I was very glad that EndGame picked right up with what everyone had been doing since the end of Infinity War. After Infinity War ended, we were all dumbstruck. We needed to see that it we weren’t alone in our grief. I think we all hoped for the best to happen with most of the characters who became dust, and were less hopeful for those who had truly met their end, like my dear Loki (but you just never know with that trickster). I think this may be why the runtime of the movie was so long. There is a LOT to cover and explain and get to, and I’m glad they did. [sidenote: I was very worried about making it thru the entire movie without a bathroom break, but I drank nothing for 2 hours before and was fine :P]

AvengersEndgame

I can’t really say too much else without giving away any plot points…I wish I could…if you see the movie and want to discuss, come find me! 😉 What I can and will say is that I cried. A LOT. There are thankfully also a lot of comedic moments to cut the tension of these big, serious themes, so it is a balance. (I anticipate quite a few memes being born from EndGame.) I definitely heard a few sniffs of crying in our audience, but nothing major, so I will just say that I am an emotional person, I cry at anything even remotely resembling any sort of relationship bond. I have always been a mushy person, a trait which has been further compounded by 20 years of motherhood and the passing of ever-fleeting time. Your mileage may vary.

AvengersEndgame

These weren’t just sad tears, though. What I felt every time I cried was a gratefulness for the family that Marvel created and shared with all of us. If they didn’t do a good job of establishing these bonds of friendship and kinship, we wouldn’t care enough to even get emotional when it all ends. There are several moments throughout the film where this display of family is pretty epic.

To bring it back to Lord of the Rings again, it really reminded me of the final Return of the King. I remember being so sad that it was over, but thankful for being able to experience the entire journey over the years. These are the life-changing moments that allow us to see and appreciate how far they’ve come, how far we’ve come, and be able to move on.

It’s been eleven years. Eleven. How much has your life changed in that time? I know mine has changed immensely since then. Eleven years ago, I had 2 kids, not 3. And those two were 8 and 9 years old. Now they are 20 and 18, and I have a 10 year old. I have gotten divorced and remarried and moved 4 times, gone back to work full time. Even this blog didn’t exist 11 years ago (though we’re coming up on the 10th anniversary!). I’m pretty much a completely different person. And so are our Avengers. To quote that 90’s hit by Semisonic, “…every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” And that is what EndGame is.

AvengersEndgame

Marvel Studios’ Avengers: EndGame opens everywhere April 26.

Disney provided us a complimentary press screening, but my opinions and thoughts are my own.

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REVIEW: Avengers: Endgame, a Conclusion 11 Years in the Making

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Before this review gets started, I’ll say that this review, like all of my others, contains NO SPOILERS, so read away with no worries of ruining the story. These are merely my lasting impressions.

About a month ago, I wrote a pretty negative review about Captain Marvel. One of the biggest takeaways from this review was that I began to feel as if I was suffering from “Marvel Fatigue”. That is to say, I felt as if there were more Marvel movies being produced than I cared to enjoy. The majority of them were only entertaining at best, but did nothing in terms of great filmmaking. They were largely ‘popcorn films’ – something you can sit down and watch, and know you’ll have a good time watching it, even though it’s not anything groundbreaking. They all followed the same basic format, and utterly, it grew quite old to me.

That is, with one exception: ‘Avengers: Infinity War’. Infinity War to me was the piéce de rèsistance of the MCU. I find myself still watching that movie over and over again, whereas I’ve still only seen most other Marvel movies one time. But I digress – point of the story is that to me, Infinity War was the climax of the series, and left me incredibly excited for Endgame. Captain Marvel just simply didn’t deliver on what I wanted from the MCU.

Endgame did.

THE NEW PIÈCE DE RÉSISTANCE.

Marvel Studios’ AVENGERS: ENDGAME..Tony Stark/Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.)..Photo: Film Frame..©Marvel Studios 2019

Avengers: Endgame is truly the thrilling conclusion we all signed up for back in 2008. None of us knew it back then, but this is what we were waiting for. I’ll actually keep my descriptions of it more brief than usual, since I know spoiling anything in the MCU – let alone a proper Avengers title – is basically a death sentence.

I was ultimately left speechless by this movie. Where the MCU typically left me wanting more – wishing that the stories would be developed deeper, that there was more of a richness or diversity to the arcs we saw – Endgame fulfilled tenfold.It truly was the Super Bowl of the MCU, the great single climax we’ve all been waiting for.

In my initial draft of this review, I listed my only ‘con’ as the runtime. I mentioned that at times, even though I wasn’t bored, I was wondering if this runtime was truly necessary. Now that I’ve had more time to think about it – yes, it absolutely was. Every aspect of this film was necessary, and the runtime was definitely a key player. I might even be able to say I find no ‘con’ in this movie,which is not an honor I throw around very lightly, and certainly not for a movie in the MCU.

There are moments that feel the same as when we first saw The Avengers in 2012, with all the giddy joy of seeing them come together on screen for the first time. There are moments that feel the same as Thor: Ragnarok, which was notable for its lighthearted fare and comedy throughout. And there are some moments that feel the same as Infinity War, with all of the depressing realism of coming to terms with the fact that you can’t win every fight.

If you enter Endgame seeking an end to the arc we began in Infinity War, you will find it. If you enter seeking a newer, bolder story, you will find it. If you enter wishing to reminisce on the nostalgia of all of your favorite Marvel characters, you can do so.It really is a cinematic spectacle the likes of which has never happened before, and might never happen again.

The most I’ll give away is this: pay attention to the score. It can often be overlooked in action movies, but I thought the soundtrack of Endgame was masterful. When utilized fully, the soundtrack can be the biggest single tool in the directors’ arsenal to help tell a story and create their masterpiece – Endgame definitely does this. There are actually a few times in this movie where the score is a big focus, and I don’t recall that being as much of an emotional moment at any other time in the MCU.

Now, while I did absolutely love this movie, I don’t think it’s the most amazing movie I’ve seen. I think initially I would be quite hesitant to put it at the same level as some of my favorite movies – The Favourite (2018), Birdman (2014), La La Land (2016), etc. But I also don’t think that’s what it was trying to be. It wasn’t your typical Oscar-nominated spectacle-of-theatre that you know will be looked back on as a classic. Or was it?

The performances were great. Robert Downey Jr. brought new depth to his role in this film alone unlike anything we’ve seen. And he’s not alone. Hemsworth, Evans, Ruffalo, the whole team were at an elevated level of performance. The storytelling was great. The music was great. The visual depth and experience were great. It’s not your typical Oscar selection, but I think it certainly manages to prove its worthiness as one.

What it did do was subvert every expectation I had of what an action movie could be. 11 years ago, I never thought I would care about what Thanos did, or who War Machine was. But Kevin Feige and the entire Marvel team have crafted a cultural moment unlike any other. I’ll be the first to say I haven’t enjoyed every stop along the way – like I said earlier, I got bored. Retaining the audience’s attention for this long was surely a daunting task, and it wasn’t always a successful one for me. Regardless, time after time, I showed up. And I’m very glad I did.

Endgame manages to do something right in the MCU. That is to say, it takes every boring and action-heavy flick in its roster and kicks them to the curb. Every low moment of the MCU we slogged through for the past 11 years was worth it for seeing the Avengers come to life on screen one last time in Endgame. Whatever it takes.

As a funny bonus, this movie was so engaging that my heart rate went a little crazy.

WHERE DO WE GO FROM HERE?

Marvel Studios’ AVENGERS: ENDGAME..L to R: Hawkeye/Clint Barton (Jeremy Renner), War Machine/James Rhodes (Don Cheadle), Ant-Man/Scott Lang (Paul Rudd), Rocket (voiced by Bradley Cooper), Black Widow/Natasha Romanoff (Scarlet Johansson), Thor (Chris Hemsworth) and Captain America/Steve Rogers (Chris Evans)..Photo: Film Frame..©Marvel Studios 2019

To say that Endgame is a great movie is actually kind of difficult. First a different question must be answered; Is it truly great, or is it great only built off the success of the 22-film MCU?

I’m a big fan of Harry Potter. And I think that Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 is a good movie, and ended the series off in a way that I was fine with. But you certainly could not watch ONLY Deathly Hallows Part 2. I think you might be able to watch ONLY Endgame (if you somehow hadn’t seen anything else in the MCU).

Really, I don’t think I can answer that original question. In fact I would be hard-pressed to find anyone who actually could. It seems as though the entire world has seen at least most of these movies, so it would be very difficult to find someone who will watch Endgame with absolutely zero prior knowledge. So I think that invalidates the question. To ask if Endgame is good is to, by association, assume whomever you’re asking has prior knowledge already. And that actually makes this easier to talk about.

Endgame is a great movie. It certainly doesn’t make any groundbreaking leaps or bounds in terms of cinematic filmmaking. But it does completely change film history. Never before have 22 films culminated to one thrilling, rollercoaster of a conclusion. And I think something like this may never happen again, or at least, I hope it doesn’t.

While I definitely enjoyed this wild 11 year ride, I’m ready for it to end. In a perfect world, this would be the end of the MCU, and we would be able to look back fondly on this crazy journey and reminisce the time of year a new Marvel movie would come out. Unfortunately, I know it doesn’t end here. They’ve already announced films like Spiderman: Far From Home, and Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 3, and who knows what else is in the works.

But if I’m being honest, after Endgame, I’m actually looking forward to whatever happens next. I’m ready for it to end, but something about the masterminds at Marvel Studios has left me curious about where we go from here. So the MCU shall continue, seemingly endlessly into the horizon, as new stories are told and new heroes are born. But for now, Endgame signifies a brief moment of rest. I no longer know what the future of the MCU holds, but I’m ready for a whole new adventure to begin.

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REVIEW: Disneynature Penguins – An Icy Tale

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Another guest reviewer on Zannaland, this time, good ol’ Otisney (aka my husband, Scott). He took Gio to see the screening of Penguins last weekend. As much as I loooove animals of all kinds, Born in China really did me in for nature movies. Sorry Disney! I don’t think I could even get myself together to post a review on that, I was so traumatized. I immediately left the theatre and sponsored a snow leopard, that’s all I remember. Anyway, from what I hear, like Bears, Penguins has no animal deaths to worry about, so I guess I could’ve gone, but I’m glad I played it safe. In any event, here’s a review on the latest Disneynature film, Penguins, released today:


Just in time for Earth Day, Disneynature is releasing its latest in a long line of gorgeous nature films. While previous films examined in beautiful detail the wondrous worlds of big African kitty cats, big Alaskan grizzly bears and exotic Chinese critters (pandas and snow leopards and golden monkeys … OH MY!), this new film checks out the unique world of the Adélie penguins.

As the film begins, we are immediately introduced to our hero penguin, Steve, who is returning to his Antarctic roots to find a mate, build a nest and start a family. In stunning visual splendor, we are given a close-up look of Steve’s daily routines, his struggles (sometimes due to the harsh climate, other times because of sharing very limited space and resources with millions of other penguins), all while trying to elude his natural predators, killer whales and leopard seals.

Penguins

Despite what you might think would be a monochromatic film (or black and white, as it were), set in the difficult climbs of mega-cold Antarctica, Penguins is such an exquisite and beautifully shot film, where everything looks super sharp and detailed. From the wavy glare of the ice floes that the penguins traverse across, to the extra fluffy powdery down feathers of all the baby penguin chicks, each frame is so incredibly detailed and crisp and bold to look at.

The filmmakers had to go through some extreme weather to shoot one breeding season of these amazing Adélie penguins that return to the exact place of their birth, find a life partner, build a suitable nest, lay, incubate and hatch eggs, and begin to raise baby penguin chicks, fattening them up for their harried march back to the ocean for the winter. The end credits, as always, showcases the amazing photographers and camera men and women and crew that had to endure these tough conditions.

Penguins is suitably narrated by the affable Ed Helms, who also occasionally provides the voices for Steve and others, oftentimes in a very silly way. His is a very familiar and comforting voice and it all feels natural and right.

Penguins

Of course, as with all Disneynature films, Disney is donating hundreds of thousands of dollars of proceeds from the admissions during the opening week in theaters to a great cause. For every ticket sold opening week (April 17-23, 2019), Disneynature will make a donation to the Wildlife Conservation Network (WCN) to help protect penguins across the southern hemisphere with opening weekend profits going to support Earth Day charities.

At 76 minutes, Penguins is long enough to be extremely compelling and make you invested in the lovable characters on screen, but short enough to not become boring or just drone on endlessly.

It’s definitely a film that is okay to take the littlest of your family members to enjoy. There is a small amount of ensuing peril, but nothing too bad and mostly off screen. I can assure you, there is a happy ending for our hero Steve and his entire family.

Disneynature Penguins gets four cold, crisp, icy stars from this reviewer.

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REVIEW: Burton’s Dumbo Soars Higher than Ever

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There’s no question that the original 1941 release of Dumbo is a landmark animation release. It’s truly a triumph of the techniques of the time that come together to cement a piece of Disney history unlike any other.

Respecting a classic…

For one reason or another, I was not very excited for the 2019 remake of Dumbo. It could’ve been because I personally was not a fan of the original for a handful of reasons. Or maybe it was because (despite him being one of my favorite directors) the recent work of Tim Burton has been rather sub-par. Either way, I didn’t know what to expect. Needless to say, I was pleasantly surprised. From the first scene of the film, where a familiar score introduces itself while we see a newer, updated Casey Jr., I knew everything was going to be okay.

WHEN I SEE AN ELEPHANT FLY — In Tim Burton’s all-new, live-action reimagining of “Dumbo,” former circus star Holt Farrier (Colin Farrell) and his children (Nico Parker and Finley Hobbins) find themselves caring—and advocating—for a newborn elephant whose oversized ears make him a laughingstock in an already struggling circus. Directed by Burton and produced by Katterli Frauenfelder, Derek Frey, Ehren Kruger and Justin Springer, “Dumbo” flies into theaters on March 29, 2019. © 2018 Disney Enterprises, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

And yes, you heard that right, I was not a fan of the original. This isn’t a review of that film, so I won’t get into it, but to sum it up, I think the original release of Dumbo is very outdated today. Comparing the runtime of the two films alone – 112 minutes to the original’s 64 – it’s clear that Burton has a much larger story to tell.

Where I find faults in the original, I find nothing but success in this retelling. But that isn’t to say that Burton completely erases any memory of the original. I think this remake pays homage to the original by respecting its legacy, and building upon it to tell a new story. You don’t need to have seen the original at all to understand this new film, but there are certainly a few nods to it that those classic fans will pick up.

…and bringing it to life.

For the past 5 years, we’ve been subject to a new kind of Disney film – the remake. It’s become something of a joke that Disney just keeps remaking their classic movies, creating an endless cycle of profitability. I personally have not been very kind to these remakes. At the base level, I don’t understand the point of remaking a classic movie as they have been doing.

2015’s Cinderella, 2017’s Beauty and the Beast, and (from the look of it) 2019’s The Lion King – just to name a few – all tell the exact same story as the original film they’re based on. The remake simply updates the graphics, or makes it “live action”, or adds a few new songs to the soundtrack, and doesn’t make any attempt at doing something radically different with the story. I don’t like these films because they seem like a waste of time. Yes, I would love to see Childish Gambino as Simba the lion, but I’d like even more to see him doing something I’ve never seen before, not exactly what I saw Matthew Broderick do 25 years ago.

I appreciated Maleficent for this reason. It wasn’t a remake of Sleeping Beauty, it was a retelling from a different perspective. Ultimately, I didn’t like that movie as a whole, but it’s the only “remake” that I felt actually justified its existence. That is, until Tim Burton’s Dumbo.

Dumbo (2019) takes the simple concept of the original movie, ‘a flying elephant in a circus’, and runs away with it. Burton’s movie does feature some of the same events as the original, but builds upon them in a way that is wholly unique and more powerful than the original was.

DREAMING BIG — In Tim Burton’s all-new, live-action reimagining of “Dumbo,” persuasive entrepreneur V.A. Vandevere (Michael Keaton) decides that a young elephant from a struggling circus belongs in his newest, larger-than-life entertainment venture, Dreamland. Directed by Burton and produced by Katterli Frauenfelder, Derek Frey, Ehren Kruger and Justin Springer, “Dumbo” flies into theaters on March 29, 2019. © 2018 Disney Enterprises, Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Burton was clearly the best choice to tell this story. Don’t go into this movie expecting his typical gothic atmosphere, but do expect his ability to turn a dark story or dark events into a bright and vibrant world. This movie feels very similar to his remake of Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory. From the soundtrack to the over-the-top visuals, they both respect the classic and truly bring it to life.

I’ll leave it at this – this is the movie we thought we were watching when we saw the original Dumbo. You can go back and watch the original and still respect it for its legacy, still honor the achievement it made, and still love the story it told. But watching Burton’s new take on the film brings back all of the wonder and amazement of truly seeing it for the first time. It’s the movie that made me a Dumbo fan.

GOTTA FLY – Visionary filmmaker Tim Burton helms the live-action reimagining of Disney’s 1941 animated classic “Dumbo.” “’Dumbo’ was always one of my favorite Disney films,” said Burton. “We’re trying to give it the same heart, feeling and emotion that we all loved about the original.” Starring Colin Farrell, Michael Keaton, Danny DeVito, Eva Green, Nico Parker and Finley Hobbins, “Dumbo” is currently in production in England. © 2017 Disney Enterprises, Inc. All Rights Reserved..

Dumbo opens Friday, March 29, 2019 in theatres everywhere. You can read Zannaland’s original Dumbo animated feature review here.

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NEW: Toy Story 4 Full Trailer -But…Do We Need THIS Toy Story?

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DisneyPixar just released the newest trailer for Toy Story 4, and unlike our previous short glimpses at new characters, this full trailer reveals the storyline and plot of the fourth Toy Story movie. If you haven’t seen it yet, here it is:

So, what did you think? My initial viewing left me scratching my head. I mean, I love most all of the Pixar films, even Cars 2 (for its visuals) which most people did not rave about. I appreciate a good cry, despite knowing Pixar is manipulating my heartstrings and leaving me a blubbering mess.

When former Disney Animation Chief Creative Officer John Lasseter spoke about Toy Story 4 at the D23 Expo in 2015, he mentioned that it was going to be Woody and Bo Peep’s love story. I was cautiously optimistic about that, even tho, Toy Story 3 had wrapped the toys’ lives up so neatly, I figured there would be a backstory/prequel aspect to Woody and Bo Peep, and perhaps they’d be reunited. Well, a LOT has happened since that D23 Expo, and obviously, whatever tale John Lasseter may have planned to tell, probably got changed a bit if not completely. Just as we no longer have “Gigantic” to look forward to (which I must admit I am thankful for, after learning a bit about it at the same 2015 D23 Expo), ideas change, directors change, and sometimes things get shelved altogether. I’m not sure why Pixar felt like this was a story they needed to tell, especially after Toy Story 3 left everyone with such warm fuzzy feelings (at least that’s what I was left with after sobbing uncontrollably for about 20 mins).

Let’s go through my initial reactions as I watched, and see if you agree…Ok, Bonnie makes “Forky” and Woody gloms onto him (having learned not to be threatened by new toys way back in the original Toy Story) and proclaims Forky to be the most important toy to Bonnie right now, and as such must be protected at all costs. Now this is where they lost me right off the bat. Maybe if this movie came out in 1999, I might relate better to this concept. That’s when I had my first child, and sure, if there was something that he created and loved more than anything, I could see myself going to extreme lengths to make sure this toy was always there. However, this is a spork with googly eyes and pipe cleaners attached. A craft project, that – and this is the joy of arts and crafts – you could create again and again. If my son made a spork guy and that spork got stepped on and cracked, or his eyes fell off, or he simply got lost, we’d make a new one. I understand that Woody may not know or understand this concept, but the majority of the audience watching should.

So while I can see what they were trying to do here with Woody “doing the right thing” and saving the spork, it just doesn’t hold as much weight as losing Buzz, or Slinky Dog, or even Bo Peep, who he seemed resigned to forget about in Toy Story 3. Additionally, if the message they are trying to send is “every friend a child ‘creates’ is special and must be preserved at all costs…” that’s not a very realistic parenting message.

Life is about growth; growing up, making changes, some harder than others, and yes, some things get left behind. A spork made in school simply does not equate to a childhood dog, or friend, or toy that never left your side. But as a parent of 3 children, if any of them did lose a special toy, and nothing could be done to find it or bring it back, we would move on and that toy would become a cherished memory. Because as much as we, as parents, may grow attached to certain things our children once loved or played with or even wore, chances are more than likely they will cast them aside as they grow up and move on to bigger and better things. (Which I am knee-deep in as my youngest, now 10, is finally cleaning out his room and donating some toys that he’s either had from birth, inherited from his older brother and sister, or were once beloved and now collecting dust.)

And THAT is the lesson that Pixar made so clear in Toy Story 3. After ripping our hearts out with “When Somebody Loved Me,” the song woven throughout Jessie’s backstory, we all felt incredible guilt for donating toys we once loved. Toy Story 3 wiped that guilt clean with the acknowledgement that toys can be passed on to new generations of children who will love and care for them, creating new everlasting memories.

So whether Woody represents a parenting mentality in this tale, not wanting to upset Bonnie, or one of a friend not wanting to leave another friend behind, it seems like a very weak storyline to build an entire movie on, even if it’s only a stepping off point to get to finding Bo Peep. And the spork doesn’t even want to be alive! So let him go. There are so many other sporks available to stick googly eyes on. But it’s happening. This is the path Pixar has chosen. Woody flies out after Forky, and their journey to get back to Andy Bonnie, now begins.

Next up, Woody spies Bo’s old lamp in an antique shop, and has to go in to see if she’s there. As is the case with Toy Story 2 (Stinky Pete) and Toy Story 3 (Lotso) there are “bad toys” (in this case ventriloquist dummy dolls under the command of a creepy talking doll) in the antique shop, which try to attack and capture Woody and Forky. I mean…is this the best they could do? I appreciate the nod to the original ventriloquist concept that Woody was once going to be before the first Toy Story was completed, but apart from that, it’s getting a bit repetitive here, no? And this time instead of Jessie coming to the rescue as she did in the Toy Story of Terror short, it’s Bo Peep who rescues Woody. From what we can see, Bo has become a strong, independent woman while she’s been away from Andy’s room.

At this point in the trailer, we also see Buzz has jumped out of the moving RV where all the toys began with Bonnie, and stumbles into a pretty permanent-looking carnival set up. Bo Peep also gestures to this same carnival, asking Woody if he wouldn’t rather live there than a kid’s room. Forky seems to have been converted to the cult of being a kid’s toy, and asks if they are going back to Bonnie. So the same hijinx will now ensue, with Woody and Buzz separated, both of them separated from their kid, Bonnie in this case, and new toys who either hinder or help them along their journey back to where they belong.

The whole thing just left me with a very “meh” reaction. It doesn’t seem like anything new will be learned here, it’s the same old story with a new location, and the same ending looks likely. I’m sure I could be mistaken, and I welcome being proven wrong and loving this movie. For now, though, it seems like Pixar is just trying to rewrite the same story (and I’m not sure who they are trying to appeal to). Maybe they are hoping a whole new generation of fans will just jump on the Woody bandwagon. But as mentioned before, they ended things so perfectly with Toy Story 3, it would’ve taken an exceptional story or backstory to top that.


So long, partner.

So what do you think? Did we need this new story? Do you like how the plot looks in the trailer? Do you think there’s a lot still missing that may make this a new Toy Story favorite? Share your thoughts below or with me on social media!

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REVIEW: Captain Marvel; or Living with Marvel Fatigue

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Over the course of 10 years, we have all slowly been indoctrinated into the cult of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. We have simply come to accept that seeing a Marvel movie is part of the yearly routine – or as of late, part of the seasonal routine. I accept it willingly, myself. Even at their worst, the MCU has been able to produce 21 movies that are quite entertaining. Some are great, some are Thor: The Dark World. Regardless, Groot, Thanos, and Doctor Strange have all become household names thanks to the MCU.

The beauty of these films is that they can be very rewarding for the fans of the original comics, who gasp at the sight of a character they never thought they’d see on a movie screen, who they recognize immediately from their childhood. And they’re able to do this without it being a turn-off for the general audience who don’t make those immediate connections, and who may have never heard of the characters.

Having watched all of these movies upon release, and then multiple times after, I have become inundated with the knowledge of things I didn’t think I would care about. But ever since Avengers: Age of Ultron, something has been lurking in my mind that I like to call ‘Marvel Fatigue’ (noun): Extreme tiredness caused by an excessive amount of Marvel movies, over, and over, and over.

So let’s discuss Captain Marvel.


Marvel Studios’ CAPTAIN MARVEL..Captain Marvel (Brie Larson) ..Photo: Film Frame..©Marvel Studios 2019

For those who manage to not stay into the know of every happening within the making of all of these movies, Captain Marvel takes place in the 90s. And if you didn’t know this before going into the movie, you’ll definitely know it by the end.

Don’t get me wrong, stylistically/culturally, the 90s is one of my favorite eras, so I’m ready for all the Nirvana and frosted tips you can give me. But I legitimately lost count of how many times the audience laughed at this movie for simply saying “Hey remember the 90’s? That was weird, huh!” It’s a minor gripe, sure, because it doesn’t really have much to do with the story, but it happened so many times it started to drive me crazy. I’m talking Blockbuster, Nine Inch Nails, Radio Shack, Payphones, Pagers, etc. all within the first act. To be fair, one could point out that the Guardians of the Galaxy films center on very late 70s and 80s culture. The difference is that Guardians is funny.

This feeling of being overcome with the same joke over and over again is how I feel with the MCU as whole. As of Marvel, I have seen 21 movies that all tie together with all of these very different characters. But the feeling of seeing new characters tie into a universe we already know things about can only last so long. The routine grows old eventually. Captain Marvel, to me, never seemed to find its place amongst these self-love reveals and the groan-worthy amount of 90s references.

Sure, I already mentioned people laughed, so obviously people managed to find it entertaining. That’s the point of all of the references. But it makes for lazy writing. Yeah, you can have a movie that just feeds off of audience members reacting positively to things they recognize, but if it needs all those references to survive, what will the lasting impact of the movie itself be? This was truly the Emoji Movie (or the Ralph Breaks the Internet) of the MCU: story aside, it thrived solely off of people recognizing the pieces of pop culture which it seemed to toss together into a collage of empty nostalgia.

Marvel Studios’ CAPTAIN MARVEL..L to R: Maria Rambeau (Lashana Lynch) and Captain Marvel (Brie Larson) ..Photo: Film Frame..©Marvel Studios 2019

Another glaring issue I had with Captain Marvel, was that it looks like it tried to be a ‘female empowerment’ movie. Whether or not this is what it actually was going for is something I may never know, but it’s certainly the impression I got from the trailers. Some parts of the movie still tried to be like this too, with random throwaway lines about how women can do anything. Which they can. But it definitely felt very very forced in this movie.

The Captain Marvel comics were not about female empowerment at all, at least from what the little research I have done after seeing the movie seems to indicate. Originally Mar-Vell is a man, and when, in 2012, the character of Carol Danvers (who we follow in the Marvel movie) takes over the role of Captain Marvel, it still is not about female empowerment. She simply takes over the mantle when Mar-Vell dies, because Captain America believes it’s what he would want.

My problem with this is that when 2016’s Wonder Woman came out, there was a sort of rallying cry around the empowerment aspects of it, because it was truly well done. While I still had other problems with Wonder Woman, I thought that arc they tried to convey really payed off. I think it’s pretty common knowledge that in the original comics, Wonder Woman is rubber-banded between being almost laughably stereotypical and being far superior to the men who hold her down. When the movie completely shatters all of those previous tropes, it comes across a lot stronger because it has a meaning behind it, and the story is almost directly linked to this point specifically.

When Captain Marvel attempts this, it feels as if executives saw the success of Wonder Woman, remembered they had a movie with a female lead in the works, and decided to try to replicate it when there wasn’t really anything there.

The last thing I’ll say about this issue was that in the end, shoe-horned in or not, the empowerment they tried to achieve wasn’t good at all. While I could easily say “Hey get yer darn feminist views out of my cool superhero movies!!”, the arc that was in the movie wasn’t even ‘feminist’ in any sense of the word. If Captain Marvel was played by a guy in this movie, the story could actually be exactly the same, because Danvers never battles any overpowering male force holding her back. In a way, it’s a human empowering story. She realizes that as a human, she can still be great, even if she thought she was something more.

I think it’s very okay to just have an ‘empowering’ movie. Not specifically female empowering, not specifically minority empowering. Both of those are obviously great, and super important. But I also think that a movie can just be empowering, and give anyone hope or a purpose or a voice or a way to see themselves on screen when they feel like they’re alone. Captain Marvel does a great job at this. But it does so after selling itself as something it is definitely not.

Marvel Studios’ CAPTAIN MARVEL..Goose ..Photo: Film Frame..©Marvel Studios 2019

So where do we stand? From what I’ve already written, it’s clear I didn’t like some major aspects of the story the way it was told – but did I like the movie or not? The answer is I really don’t know.

I think I appreciate what the movie tried to do; it tried to rewrite the book on how origin stories are told, by telling it How I Met Your Mother style. (She already has her powers, but where did they come from?) It tried to fill in what tiny gaps are left in the Avengers story we already know. It tried to serve as a lasting memorial to it’s infamous creator Stan Lee. But while I think it certainly did do some of those things, I also think that they alone did not justify it being a successful movie.

In a word, Captain Marvel was unmemorable – perhaps the worst fate for a movie that carries such importance. The 21st in a saga; the final film before a climactic ending 11 years in the making. And it was just forgettable. Captain Marvel was certainly an entertaining way to spend 2 hours. What $150+ million movie wouldn’t be? Visually it rivaled Guardians at some points. The performances were good, and Samuel L Jackson in particular was great as always. There were definitely some moments where I thought it was funny, or cool, or interesting, but not the whole thing. I could name any scene in Infinity War, or Ragnarok, or Doctor Strange, but walking out of Marvel – and still while writing this – I didn’t remember every character’s name.

So why? Why are those movies good and this one bad? Other than the issues with the story that I already pointed out – which already left a bad taste in my mouth, this one just felt bland. In a world where we already have an Infinity War, and even a Spider-Man: Into the Spiderverse, it’s hard for a Captain Marvel to truly leave a mark. If this was released before either of those, I think I would’ve let it slide as much as I let Ant-Man slide. But the release date of this turned it into the film-equivalent to eating dessert before dinner.

It should be noted that Marvel is not the first film in the MCU to leave this poor of a taste in my mouth. I think both Ant Man’s are boring, and I already joked about Thor earlier. It’s easy for a movie to just not be interesting at all when its sole purpose is to fit as a tiny piece into a much larger puzzle. Marvel Studios or Disney doesn’t need this movie to even be good because they know everyone is going to see it anyway. We have to do our homework and sit through the Marvels of the world so we get to enjoy the Avengers’. A film like Captain Marvel can often worsen the effects of Marvel Fatigue. The doctor recommendation is instead a healthy dose of Infinity War or Spiderverse.

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